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Funny jokes about fruits and vegetables in Spanish
Who said language studies shouldn't be fun? The word for jokes in Spanish is chiste although it could also be translated as broma. The latter is more like a practical joke or a prank that you play on someone, while the former is a witty line or story that you tell to someone, and I've got some good ones for you in this post. As well as making you laugh, they might help with your Spanish learning, and teach you some new words.
1) Disculpa, pero no hablo mandarín.
Sorry, but I don't speak mandarin.
2) ¿Qué es peor que encontrar un gusano en tu manzana?
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Encontrar medio gusano en tu manzana.
Finding half a worm in your apple.
3) Lo sé, se supone que soy una fruta, ¡pero me siento más como una verdura!
I know, I'm supposed to be a fruit, but I feel more like a vegetable!
4) ¿Cómo sabes que las zanahorias son buenas para la vista?
How do you know carrots are good for your eyes?
Porque nunca he visto un conejo usando anteojos.
Because I've never seen a rabbit wearing glasses.
5) ¡Oh, no! Estoy gorda.
Oh no! I'm so fat.
Pero tienes del tipo de grasa saludable!
But you're the good kind of fat.
6) Parece que tienes resaca, amigo.
You look really hungover, dude.
Sí, me hicieron puré anoche.
Yeah, I got smashed last night
7) ¿Qué dice la uva cuando la pisan?
What does a grape say when you step on it?
Mientras sea uva, pueden pisarme, pero cuando sea vino, tendrán que tragarme.
As long as I'm a grape, you can step on me, but when I become wine, you'll have to swallow me.
8) No hables con esa presumida. Me dijeron que es un transgénico.
Don't talk to that smug. I heard she is genetically modified.
9) ¡Genial! Mira quien se cortó. Ahora todos vamos a empezar a llorar.
Great! Look who cut himself. Now we're all going to start crying.
10) Jajaja
ha ha ha
¡Inmaduras!
(You're) Immature!
11) Naranja: ¿Hace mucho que espera?
Orange: Have you been waiting long?
La manzana escuchó: «¿Hace mucho que es pera?»
Apple heard: «Have you been a pear for a long time?»
Manzana: No. ¡Siempre he sido manzana!
Apple: No. I have always been an apple!
12) ¡Oiga! ¡Nosotras estábamos antes!
Hey! We were here first!
¡Déjala! Es otra piña colada.
Leave her! She's just another pineapple jumping the queue!
Explanation: Piña colada is a popular classic cocktail made with pineapple juice, rum, and coconut. The name means «strained pineapple» in Spanish. The verb colar means «to strain» but colarse means «to jump the queue» or «cut in line».
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